Things change, especially in my colon

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This was supposed to be a post about a surprisingly fun and interesting college alumni event that I attended last Thursday.

It was also supposed to be posted last Friday, maybe Saturday, at the latest. Because it really was a fun and interesting event, complete withon a cool seminar delivered by a lively speaker in a spiffy venue with bitching food and bev, which, frankly, I think is some weird, Cornellian point of pride because of that hotel school they’ve got.

However, as long-time readers of communicatrix-dot-com well know, I have Crohn’s disease, which basically means:

  1. My colon is a tyrant
  2. Like most tyrants, is willful, capricious and wildly oversensitive
  3. My colon likes to exercise its supreme power over me at the most inconvenient of times
  4. In the war between posting and colon repair, [my colon always wins.]*

As much as I seem to rattle on about personal stuff here, I really keep the bulk (ha, ha, I said “bulk”) of my personal shit (ha, ha, I said…oh, never mind…) private. Because really, how sexy is it to go into the gory details of your life when you’re in the 45th year of it? You catch my drift.

Anyway. Major fires have been put out. Pesky low-grade existential crisis lingers, but all hands are back on deck, er, in L.A., safe and sound, which has done wonders for my peace of mind, which, in turn, has done wonders for my lower intestine.

But I would be remiss if I did not take this opportunity to, one more time, plug the wonders of the Specific Carbohydrate Diet, which continues to be the single greatest thing I’ve ever done for my intestinal health, and possibly my health in general.

It’s not an easy diet to follow (quick: give up sugar, starch, and all even minimally-processed food!). I’d strayed from it over the last year because, ironically enough, I’d been feeling so good. But as anyone with Crohn’s or UC (or celiac disease, or IBS, or other pesky intestinal illness) will tell you, stress is a huge trigger for flare-ups. And for me, flare-ups are only stopped with the double-edged sword that is prednisone, king-daddy of the steroids.

Thankfully, five days back on the diet with fanatical adherence and things are looking up. I have a goodly portion of my energy back, and no longer feel like I might have to drop to whatever horizontal surface I’m on to nap. (At one low point over the last few days, I actually curled up in a ball on a closet floor for 15 minutes, rock on, party girl!)

Which is good, because right now, I’ve got to drive a motor vehicle downtown and beg the cold-hearted DMV employees to overlook a mailing deadline I missed while I was passing out on closet floors.

So, posts on goal-free living and other fun and exciting stuff soon. Meanwhile, if you see a middle-aged woman passed out on the floor of the Metropolitan Courthouse, for god’s sake, don’t give her a candy bar thinking it’ll help…


*Left bracketed part out in the original post. See? My colon really does rule.


  1. After a long and difficult day, it made me happy to read that you’re doing well — and I don’t even know you, aside from reading your blog after you left a comment on mine. : )

    It’s remarkable how much of a difference diet can make with health issues, and it’s very reassuring to know that one can do a lot to improve a situation aside from relying on prescriptions.

  2. I have read some of your blog. We have a friend whose persistent diarrhea has not been satisfactorily diagnosed. She’s settled for “irritable bowel syndrome,” but in a recent conversation with other people, someone said to me that persistent diarrhea is how Crohn’s shows itself the first time to someone who’s going to have to deal with it from then on.

    Is this accurate information?

    Can you point me to good sources? Googling “crohn’s onset” with “diarrhea” yielded only your blog!

  3. Michael, I’m sorry you had a long and difficult day, but I’m glad that my bowel movements could make you a little happier.

    And Jeremy, it feels nice to be missed. So thank you.

    Mason, I’m not sure if my archives are working properly since the move from TypePad screwed up a mass of permalinks. I must preface everything I say by reminding people that while I am fabulous, I am not an M.D., and you should treat info from me accordingly.

    That said, there are many ways Crohn’s presents, and digestive disorders in general are very difficult to diagnose. My own DX is still a 50/50, maybe-Crohn’s/maybe ulcerative colitis proposition. I would encourage your friend to continue exploring her condition until she is satisfied, and to research the hell out of it on her own in the meantime. I’m particularly suspicious of the IBS DX, since “syndromes” in general kind of get the “it’s all in your head, darling” brush-off.

    My links are all down since the move, but some good places to start reading up on the Specific Carbohydrate Diet (which will also give you lots of information on why your friend might be experiencing chronic diarrhea) are:

    Tanya’s SCD page
    Elaine Gottschall’s official site

    Going on SCD does not preclude going on meds; Elaine Gottschall always encouraged people to work with their doctors, but not relinquish power to them. You are your own best advocate, since your only agenda is to get well.

    And Elaine’s book is a must-read, whether you decide to follow the diet or not.

  4. “Michael, I’m sorry you had a long and difficult day, but I’m glad that my bowel movements could make you a little happier.”

    I feel so dumb! Looking back, I guess my comment doesn’t sound exactly as I’d wanted it to. All I meant was that it made me happy to know that things were/are getting better for you.

  5. Michael, don’t feel dumb at all! I totally took you at your word initially, and was just trying to be my smart-ass self. Which, apparently, I did—in spades.

    Sorry for the misunderstanding. Damn this interweb and its lack of tone!

  6. Hey – you’re back! Sorry you’ve been feeling like sleeping on closet floors. Can you actually eat that fabulous Chicago giardiniera on the SCD?

    Glad to hear you’re on the mend!

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