‘Tis the season to want to plug thy neighbor through the eyebrows

Remember back when you were a kid (those of you born pre-1968), before the era of grocery stores accepting every kind of plastic and bagging things in anything but? (I said “but”.)

Remember how everyone, everyone, who wasn’t paying cash had to get their checks cleared at the service counter beforehand? How they had to show I.D. and write out everything except the amount, tear the check out of the  checkbook, hand it over to be cleared and stamped and initialed and whatever else before they ever dreamed of getting on (E. of Ohio)/in (everywhere else) line?

Well, I do. And guess what? It was a good system. Because not only did it speed things up, it was a gigantic and singular blow against the creeping solipsism of urban life. As in, Get a clue, Senor Asswipe! You’re not the only pony in this here corral!

I know I’m supposed to be all Buddhist and “thispersonismyteacher” and all, but WT-motherfucking-F!?! How on the ball do you have to be to realize you should (a) have your I.D. hopefully somewhere moderately accessible on your person but (b) definitely not “maybe” in the car parked out on the lot?

Sweet baby jeebus, these holidays cannot be over fast enough for me…

xxx
c

4 comments

  1. … and do you want cash back? Donation to Kids Without Head.? Oops? Wrong password? Hit CANCEL? Do you want cash back? No. You do? Oh, hit CANCEL? Choose cash back…. AAAARGHHH!!!! Feeling your pain. Now, do this in the ‘burbs where they ain’t as smart as City-Folk.

  2. … and do you want cash back? Donation to Kids Without Heads? Oops? Wrong password? Hit CANCEL? Do you want cash back? No. You do? Oh, hit CANCEL? Choose cash back…. AAAARGHHH!!!! Feeling your pain. Now, do this in the ‘burbs where they ain’t as smart as City-Folk.

  3. I lived east of Ohio (in NE Pennsylvania) and we stood in line, not on line. Not to imply that standing in line was the local pastime or anything. That would have been “cruisin’ da square” and “hangin’ out at da mall.”

  4. i remember hearing about stores in those times and also when nellie oleson didn’t share her licorice with laura. you must have a lot of buffalo nickels. you should post some daguerreotypes on flickr.

    ah, i too cannot wait for these holidays to pass.

Comments are closed.